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Comparisons

This afternoon, as I was waiting for my lunch, I received a text message from Johann's former nanny. She was asking about him and about Javi. We exchanged several messages then came a reply, " Di pala katulad ni Johann, naglalakad na nun nag-birthday."

That ticked me off. I set her straight that Javi is just like Johann at that stage. I got the feeling that she is proud of her alaga and is taking credit for her alaga's achievements.

As a parent, I try not to compare my two kids. Every time I feel it creeping into my head, I remind myself that each child is different and develops differently. I know, it is easy for observers to succumb to comparison. Sometimes, I know, it can't be helped.

As a parent, I want my kids to be their best selves. Their best may not be better than others'. Nevertheless, I'd be a proud mom because they did their best.

Comparing achievements often lead to sibling rivalry or jealousy or a misplaced sense of competitiveness. It is something I want to avoid, if possible.

If you become a parent yourself, you'd understand.

Comments

Deepa said…
this reminds me of my mom who would give my sister and myself identical sets of toys every christmas. she also insisted that we attend the same schools even though i wanted to transfer to another high school when i was 13. she took care to make sure both of us had the same advantages to avoid sibling rivalry. she succeeded :)
CathyCE said…
That is an interesting tactic. I wonder if that would work with my boys.

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